The Tempest Online™

~ Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc. ~

Not Bad For A Non-Gambler

Posted by Daniel on April 7, 2009

I’ve lately grown fond of us driving up into the mountains with Shane & Cole to go to the biggo casino.  It’s a long scary drive, but not too bad if I don’t have to do the actual driving.

Since none of us are actually into the whole compulsive gambling thing,   (honestly, I am more into the loud noises and pretty shiny sparkly video effect on both main and upper screens) we all pretty much stick to the one and two cent slot machines.  That is, if we can actually get one.  I swear there are times when you have to practically pry the cold dead hands of some pretty trashy people off of those machines.

This past Sunday after a great day out on the lake getting some MUCH-NEEDED sun, we went back to the casino.

Wizard of Oz Penny SlotThe very first place I b-line it to is the Wizard of Oz penny slot machine.  I love this one because you can play all night on VERY little and yet I’ve been very lucky on it.  All told, out of all the visits up there, I’m ahead on that machine by about $300+.

Then, just when I feel that I’ve got a pretty good groove going on with Dorothy, this casino goes and puts in a new set of machines.  First there is now a different version of the Dorothy machines, and also a new set of Star Trek ones as well.

First off, I have yet to get to play the new Dorothy machines, because they are always busy.  This past Sunday, I decided to wait it out next to them for the next available one, then pounce on it like Oprah at a buffet.  There are only four of these lined up and some white trash couple were playing three of them.  seriously, the skanky girl was playing one and had her leg up on the chair of the one next to her and she would hit the button on that one once every ten minutes.  Just as she lost all of her credits on that one, her body odor-wreaking boyfriend handed her a $20 to put into it.  then she turned to me and smiled big enough to show me all four of her teeth and said, “It looks like you’re going to have to wait a while.”

So I said, “Fuck this.”, and went around the other side of them where Cole and Shane were playing the new Star Trek machines.  As I told them what was happening on the other side of them, the guy playing next to Cole said that I should tell security, as players are not allowed to play on more than one machine at any given time.

Okay, now before I go on, I want it understood that I am NOT normally a buttinsky, but these trashy stinky people were, to be delicate, being complete dickheads.

So I told security, who quickly went to them, saw for themselves what I was saying, and told them they must give up one of the machines or leave.  He also told them that since I was next in line, they had to give me the machine.  Instead, they bitched, then let some other guy who was behind me sit down.

The male half of the trailor house-betting duo looked over at me and said, “Nobody likes a tattle tale, dude.”  Then, for added measure, the toothless wonder (girlfriend) walked over to me and said, “You are such a fuckin’ snitch!!!”

In a way, I felt bad because like I said, I don’t ordinarily go that way, but there was just something about the way they were acting (and smelling) that compelled me to cry to security.

Star Trek slots RULE!!!!

Anyway, having lost any possibility of EVER getting on one of those for the forseeable future, I gave up and waited for a Star Trek machine.  Ten minutes later I was on one and doing so well, that Cole kept cussing me out (they lost $126 on them).

I happened to notice that when you collect a certain number of badges during the game, it changes the entire game for you.  since I liked all the prettier colors of the advanced play, I was hell-bent on getting my 40 badges before I left.  Which I did, after two hours…and still won $100.

So, when the tally was complete, after taking into account cost of drinks and initial bet amounts, we left with $203 more than we arrived with.

Which came in handy, since Seth lost $100 last time there when he mistakenly used a quarter slot machine.

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One Response to “Not Bad For A Non-Gambler”

  1. Kirk said

    Can you tell us a little about how the Star Trek game works? We’ve never seen it, and we have no cascinos around here.

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